Expensive Three-Dimensional Harbour of Shells

We now live in an era that loves to keep its denizens up to date. Those who don't follow the constant evolution of technology were usually cast out from society, like how a kid would cry every single time he got back from school because he doesn't have an Xbox like his friends. And no, this is not coming from my past experiences...

Excuse me while I break down and listen to sad violin songs on the corner of my room.

Now, following the constant rapid change of what the society think is 'in', I have decided to indulge myself into the amazing epic motion picture The Avengers, proudly watched in 3D (in which, sadly for my wallet, paid $16.50 - and it was just for the ticket.) I watched the movie in a city called Shellharbour that is immeasurably far and hard to reach from where I live. By immeasurably far I mean 22.2kms. And by hard to reach I mean "There's a train station just next to the cinema why are you doing this to yourself what are you going to do with your future" kind of hard to reach.

As soon as my friends and I got into the cinema, we went our separate ways to our assigned tasks- I was sent into the deception filled world of snack registers. I was actually bamboozled by one of its workers to buy a mammoth-sized Coke. I kid you not, it was really a Bugs Bunny trying to deceive Elmer J. Fudd moment. One moment I clearly told her I didn't want any coke, that I just want a small popcorn and a bottle of water. Probably with a slight accent which any good cashier who I'm pretty sure serves tourists from Amuhrica almost every single day would understand. And then, three seconds later I'm paying $10 for something that I couldn't even drink half of. I mean, seriously? Is that the power of sales?!

You might not notice this but thanks for cleaning our stock!

After that life-changing dealmeal I got I seriously couldn't stop and concentrate on the movie. My mind kept wandering off to the coke, wondering when, how, and if I should drink it. If I wasn't eating popcorn then it wouldn't be such a dilemma, but then you can't sit down in a theater for about two hours not eating any piece of popcorn, right? Right? Guys? Hello?

In summary The Avengers was good and epic. Shellharbour 3D Cinema wasn't, though their coke undeniably was.

Give Me Those Anzac Pills!

Sydney is a big city. No- wait, it's a HUGE city. And even huge can't express how enormous it is! It is gigantic. It's a whale of a city. Heck, I think it is two whales of a city! You know, I might just keep putting in more synonyms so that I can look kind of professional in writing (yeah write that down you students, that's a good essay trick right there).

Now back to the main topic.

If you've ever been to Sydney then you would know that there's a bridge that Oprah had climbed (which sadly after knowing that she can actually did it I wasn't excited to climb it up anymore). That bridge is called (yeah, you tourists are right!) the Harbour Bridge. Is it the only bridge in Sydney? No! Does the other bridge as good looking as the Harbour Bridge? Not exactly! But, what if I tell you tourists that there's a bridge that's related to a special day which is on the 25th of April? And it has a name!

You should see the look on your face when I told you that.

Ladies and Gentlemen, that bridge is called: The Anzac Bridge. Fun fact: The one thing that came up to me when I heard this name, was medicine pills. Sleeping pills, common cold pills, paracetamol pills, and even those pills-that-made-you-smart-when-you-drink-them-pills-that-bogans-have-invented-to-turn-you-into-one-of-them pills. I think that something is actually wrong with me, considering no other person had the same image as I do whenever I yelled out Anzac in public and asked what image was on their mind.

After a little bit of browsing I found out that ANZAC stood for "The Australian and New Zealand Army Corps", which really makes more sense to me because I can't imagine what kind of medicine company has that huge amount of money and popularity that they actually made a bridge in central district Sydney to commemorate themselves. Although, there is a bridge that was almost named after Chuck Norris.

Moving back to ANZAC, the event is celebrated every 25th of April, usually starting with a Dawn Service in public parks followed by a gambling game that is banned except on ANZAC Day, and to every responsible adult it's basically alcohol all day long. Yep, that's how they pay their respect to their heroes here in Australia. They drink. An awful lot.

I've spent my day laughing in a local pub looking at billionaires (or maybe at least aspiring ones) spending their money on that 50-50 chance of winning game, but one lucky bastard actually won $400! I peeked into my wallet and tried to grab a $20, hoping to get some of that guy's luck but I soon remembered that I live on a uni budget and that Vegemite does not taste good by itself without the toast bread...

And so now I need to get a job. Oh well, there's always Anzac Day next year!

Oy, Not Hi?

A breezing wind from the sea chilled my hot blooded body this morning. Was it always this chilly? Or is it just because I turned off the heater? Wait a second...

Oh did I say a breezing wind from the sea? Ha! I wasn't trying to brag but oh well... I live in a beach house two seconds away from the beach with a hot girlfriend and a dead-as job. I also tend to do a lot of stand up comedy. Oh, and I also lie a lot. An awful lot.

True thing is I live on a way-too-much-expensive-for-one-and-a-third-yao-mings-square room in a university accommodation. But heck, I got free electricity and food! We got this meal card that has $600 in it to buy food every single time in the cafeteria! Funny thing is I was also asked for a $600 upfront money in start of this session. Wait, what?

So aside from the fact that I had to pay food even though I thought I didn't need to, I live close to the beach called the, "Fairy Meadow Beach". On occasions there are pixies and dwarfs running around. I know! I thought that they didn't exist as well, but I saw them with my own eyes! One time I saw a dwarf (I don't know what kind of dwarf it was, it was about 160 so it was pretty tall for a dwarf... but hey, he has a beard!) and he yelled, "Hey you! If you like snakes come follow me for some good fun! If you know what I mean..." and disappeared into the forest next to the beach. I politely declined because I need to go to my friend's barbecue party and I hate to miss it just because I went to Narnia. After a research I found out that the forest next to the beach was called Puckey's Estate, and scarily enough, it has many horrible stories on how innocent people who walked into the place was murdered by a psycho. God I hope that dwarf is safe!

Anyways now I have to run off to buy my friends a beer because I owe people an awful lot and whenever I got my paycheck I swear it all disappear into thin air about a day after. I don't really like to spend my money though. Except if it's for survival. And by survival I mean survival mode on expensive video games.

And oh, yeah. I live in Australia. Yes, yes, I am living the world upside down.